GEORGE AS A FATHER
Bruce Chadlowe
How can one possibly start to summarise what a man has meant to you as a father. I can’t. There are too many memories, so many feelings over a lifetime. So I only attempt to share a few inadequately expressed thoughts, from my heart which misses him.
I loved his sense of humour, everyone loved his sense of humour, it was his shining quality. I will always see him with a grin on his face, wrinkles forming, either a cheeky self-indulgent smile after telling one of his inevitable puns or a sparkle eyed contented one. He was sometimes a bit of an enigma, a very private reserved person. He was so sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of others, he really cared about people, I knew this, even if he was not always able to express it.
I think that is where his wonderful humour always shone through. He loved poetry, a great romantic deep down underneath a tough shell. To pinch one of our favourite lines of poetry that he would love: “There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.’
What a childhood he and our mother, then joined by their new partners, Mary and Gerv, have guided us sons through. The kaleidoscope of joy, excitement, adventures as well as the difficulties and painful events. We all shared so much together which has formed us into the people we are.
I remember his physical presence. Strangely, it feels the same in my memory as an adult as it did as a child. I remember holding onto his shoulders, big broad shoulders, hanging onto his back in a swimming pool as a small child.
I can still sense the shape of him now.
I remember camping trips in Chile, warm summers on the roaring South American Pacific coast, or searching for stone-age arrow heads or tarantulas under rocks in the Andes mountains.
Dad always there with cameras dangling from his neck.
When we moved to England it seemed so strange, much colder and wet. He became a keen gardener and I loved going with him to the little allotment where we dug the earth and potted things in the polytunnel.
We had wonderful adventures around Europe.
I think us sons put him through more as adolescents than any mountain dangers ever did.
We tested both those areas when we went on a climbing trip to Switzerland: What memories though. We ran out of food and with all the huts abandoned, being the end of the summer season. We had to make our last meal from a rock of stale bread we found and an old packet of soup. What an incredible sunset we had though, and for the only time in our life we got to share a rope and to watch him chip steps with his wooden handle ice axe. It seemed like we were in another world.
It was such a difficult time when he and our mother separated. But he met Mary and what a wonderful thing that has turned out to be. He was always a lucky man. I would count meeting Mary as one of his greatest blessings. She has made him such a happy contented man for over 30 years. Mary, we thank you for your dedication, compassion and extraordinary love for our father, really the greatest gift he ever received in his life.
As I progressively go through my own life journey, I so often think of his. I would have loved to have known him as a young man.
He has left me with a love and fascination with stories of adventure. I never made a visit to him without wanting to browse around his amazing collection of books. He was a wonderfully well read man and always had so many stories to tell. I have walked enthralled literally in his footsteps when we trekked through the rhododendron forests of eastern Nepal, as the tales tumbled out of him. And how we laughed at the end of that trip in our leech infested tent wearing crazy hats that we’d made from the forest ferns.
I wish we could have told him of the plans we have to return him to the snows of the magnificent New Zealand Southern Alps. His Buddhist sensibilities would I’m sure be thrilled at the idea of becoming a part of the great cycle of snows, forming into glaciers, then melting into streams, before filling the rivers that spill out across plains to the sea and get swept up into huge southern ocean storm cycles to be tossed back among the mountains.
I will miss him terribly but know we will always see him in the snows of distant mountain horizons.
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