Programme – Old Time Music Hall

NAPIER OPERATIC SOCIETY Inc.
PROUDLY PRESENTS
in its Tabard Theatre
Under the Direction of that noted Entrepreneur Miss Gillian Davies
Theatrical Agent for Artistes of Quality with the
Terpsichorial Interpretations of Madame Leigh Jones.

Professor of the Podium, Walter Edgecombe Esq.
Mistress of the Massed Pianoforte   Madam Nola Atkins

THE
SPLENDIFEROUS
SONG SHEET & BILLING FOR

OLD
TIME
MUSIC
HALL

HOST AND CHAIRMAN
PAUL GROSVENOR WARING Esq.

ROBERT HOUSTON Esq. The internationally famed Heroic bass baritone.

Madame DAWN UNSWORTH. World renowned Coloraturic artiste.

Madame SADIE BROWN. Esteemed flamboyee of the musical stage.

Miss JEAN WIGZELL. Superb and scintillating serio-comic singer and terpsichorean.

Mr DEREK WIGZELL. Cockney charmer and comic of considerable consequence.

Mr Albert BARKER. Universally acclaimed actor and sophisticate supreme.

Miss GLEN SUTHERLAND, Tragedienne tremendous and terpsichorean tres magnifique.

Mr HAROLD UNSWORTH. Renowned renditioner of Songs in Scotias national costume.

Vivacious and versatile Miss WENDY KYLE.

Mr WAYNE LISTER. Memorable master of melodrama.

LAURENCE BURNS, Esq. Theatres Thespian of all Thespians.

Miss TESSA BROWN. Statuesque artiste par excellence.

Mr HARRY FIDOE. King of comics.

Mr BUD COLLINS. Eager and able exponent of natural and nautical knowledge.

Miss CAROLE BOLTON. The epitome of rural propriety.

Mr MICHAEL KYLE. Poignant pathos personified. Songster supreme.

Mr ANTHONY BEWLEY. Dramatic baritone extraordinaire.

Miss ALISON WRIGHT. A heroine of delicacy and delight.

Mr MICHAEL HYDE. Fresh from his triumphant tour of Chipping Sodbury.

Miss JEANNETTE MURRAY whose fluent rendering will tug at your heartstrings.

Demure and fragile Miss ANN-MARIE GREATREX.

And introducing the young voice of SPENCER GAY.

Together with
Tantalising Terpsichorians [Terpsichoreans]
Scintillating Scenas
Captivating Choruses

The management reserve the right to dismiss any artiste for misdemeanours and indiscretions pertaining to the performance of the above mentioned.

1   LET’S ALL GO DOWN THE STRAND

Let’s all go down the Strand
Let’s all go down the Strand
I’ll be leader, you can march behind
Come with me, and see what we can find.
Let’s all go down the Strand
Oh, what a happy land.
That’s the place for fun and noise
All among the girls and boys
So, let’s all go down the Strand.

HELLO! HELLO! WHO’S YOUR LADY FRIEND

Hello! Hello! Who’s your lady friend?
Who’s the little girlie by your side?
I’ve seen you with a girl or two
Oh! Oh! Oh! I am surprised at you
Hello! Hello! Stop your little games
Don’t you think your ways you ought to mend?
It isn’t the girl I saw you with at Brighton
Who, who, who’s your lady friend?

THE HONEYSUCKLE AND THE BEE

You are my honeysuckle, I am the bee
I’d like to sip the honey sweet from those red lips you see.
I love you dearly, dearly, and I want you to love me
You are my honeysuckle,
I am the bee.

WHILE STROLLING IN THE PARK

While strolling in the park one day
In the merry month of May
I was taken by surprise
By a pair of roguish eyes
In a moment my poor heart was stole away
A smile was all she gave to me (whistle)
But soon we were as happy as could be (whistle)
Ah! I immediately raised my hat
And finally did remark,
“I shall never forget the charmer that I met
That happy day while strolling in the Park.”

DAISY BELL

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do!
I’m half crazy, all for the love of you!
Etc., etc.

JOSHUAH

Joshuah, Joshuah
|Why don’t you call and see mamma?
She’ll be pleased to know
You are my best beau.
Joshuah, Joshuah,
Nicer than lemon squash you are
Yes, by gosh you are, Josh-u-oshuah!

WHEN I TAKE MY MORNING PROMENADE

As I take my morning promenade,
Quite a fashion-card on the promenade,
Now I don’t mind nice boys staring hard
If it satisfies their desire.
Do you think my dress is a little bit
Just a little bit not too much of it?
If it shows my shape, just a little bit
That’s the little bit the boys admire

PUT ON YOUR TA-TA

Put on your ta-ta little girlie,
Do do what I want you to!
Far from the busy hurly-burly
I’ve got lots to say to you.
My head’s completely twirly-whirly
My girl I want you to be.
So put on your ta-ta, your pretty little ta-ta
And come out a-tata with me

2   THE AMATEUR WHITEWASHER

Chorus:
Slap dab, slap dab, up and down the brickwork,
Slap dab, all day long
In and out the corners, round the Johnny Horners.
We were a pair of right keen “goners”
Slap dab, slap went the white-wash brush
Blimey did we have a ball.
But I put more whitewash on the old woman
Than I did upon the garden wall.

3   WAITING AT THE CHURCH

Chorus:
There was I waiting at the church
Waiting at the church, waiting at the church
When I found he’d left me in the lurch
Oh how it did upset me.
Then he sent me round a little note
Here’s the very note and this is what he wrote,
“Can’t get away to marry you today
My wife won’t let me.”

4   THE MINERS DREAM OF HOME

I saw the old homestead and faces I love
I saw England’s valleys and dells,
I listened with joy, as I did when a boy
To the sound of the old village bells.
The fire was burning brightly
‘Twas a night that should banish all sin,
For the bells were ringing the old year out,
And the New Year in.

5   SCHOOL DAYS SCENA

School days, school days
Dear old golden rule days
Readin’ and writing’ and ‘rithmetic
Taught to the tune of a hick’ry stick
You were my Queen in calico
I was your bashful barefoot beau
And you wrote on my slate
“I love you Joe”
When we were a couple of kids

DADDY WOULDN’T BUY ME A BOW-WOW

Chorus:
Daddy wouldn’t buy me a bow-wow (bow-wow)
Daddy wouldn’t buy me a bow-wow (bow-wow)
I’ve got a little cat, I am very fond of that,
But I’d rather have a bow-wow-wow

OUR LODGER’S SUCH A NICE YOUNG MAN

Chorus:
Our lodger’s such a nice young man,
Such a good young man is he;
So good, so kind to all our family!
He’s never going to leave us.
Oh dear, oh dear no!
He’s such a good, goody man
Mamma told me so.

I DON’T WANT TO PLAY IN YOUR YARD

Chorus:
I don’t want to play in your yard,
I don’t like you any more
You’ll be sorry when you see me
Swinging on our garden door
You’d can’t holla down our rain-barrel,
You can’t climb our apple tree
I don’t want to play in your yard
If you won’t be good to me.

6   HOLD YOUR HAND OUT NAUGHTY BOY

Chorus:
Hold your hand out, naughty boy!
Hold your hand out, naughty boy!
Last night in the pale moonlight
I saw yer! I saw yer!
With a nice girl in the park
You were strolling full of joy,
And you told her you’d never kissed a girl before
Hold your hand out, naughty boy.

LOVE SCENA

7   IN THE SHADE OF THE OLD APPLE TREE

In the shade of the old apple tree
Where the love in your eyes I could see
When the voice that I heard
Like the song [of] a bird,
Seemed to whisper sweet music to me
I could hear the dull buzz of the bee
In the blossoms when you said to me,
“With a heart that is true
I’ll be waiting for you
In the shade of the old apple tree”.

I’LL BE YOUR SWEETHEART

I’ll be your sweetheart if you will be mine
All my life I’ll be your valentine
Bluebells I’ve gathered
Keep them and be true.
When I’m a man my plan
Will be to marry you.

IF YOU WERE THE ONLY GIRL IN THE WORLD

If you were the only girl in the World,
And I were the only boy
Nothing else would matter in the world today.
We could go on loving in the same old way.
A Garden of Eden, just made for two,
With nothing to mar our joy.
I would say such wonderful things to you
There would be such wonderful things to do
If you were the only girl in the World
And I were the only boy.

I LOVE YOU TRULY

I love you truly dear.
Life with its sorrow, life with its tear,
Fades into dreams when I feel you are near
For I love you truly, truly, dear

SEASIDE SCENA

8   I DO LIKE TO BE BESIDE THE SEASIDE

Oh I do like to be beside the seaside,
I do like to be beside the sea;
I do like to stroll upon the prom, prom, prom,
Where the brass bands play
Tid-de-ly-om-pom-pom!
So just let me be beside the seaside,
I’ll be beside myself with glee.
There’s lots of girls beside;
I should like to be beside
Beside the seaside! Beside the sea!

WE PARTED ON THE SHORE

EVERY NICE GIRL LOVES A SAILOR

THE SWIMMING MASTER

HORNPIPE

SYBIL

SHE SELLS SEA SHELLS

Chorus:
She sells sea shells on the seashore
The shells she sells are seashells I’m sure
For if she sells seashells on the seashore
Then I’m sure she sells seashore shells

THE MERMAID

BY THE SEA

9   OH Mr PORTER

Chorus:
Oh Mr Porter, what shall I do
I’m on my way to Birmingham
But they’ve taken me on to Crewe.
Take me back to London
As quickly as you can.
Oh Mr Porter what a silly girl I am.

10   THE MAN WHO BROKE THE BANK AT MONTE CARLO

Chorus:
As I walk along the Bois Boulong
With an independent air,
You can hear the girls declare:
“He must be a millionaire;
You can hear them sigh and wish to die
You can see them wink the other eye
At the man who broke the
Bank at Monte Carlo

11   SING AS WE GO

Sing as we go and let the world go by
Singing a song we march along the highway
Say goodbye to sorry, there’s always tomorrow
To think of today.
Sing as we go although the skies are grey
Beggar or king you’ve got to sing a gay tune
A song and a smile making life worth while
So sing as we go along.

PRETTY POLLY PERKINS   12

Chorus:
She was as beautiful as a butterfly
And as proud as a queen
Was pretty little Polly Perkins of Paddington Green.

FINALE:

13    Chorus:
Knees up Mother Brown
Knees up Mother Brown
Come along Dearie, let it go
Ee-iy, Ee-iy, Ee-iy Oh
It’s your bloomin’ birthday
So wake up all the town
Knees up, knees up, don’t get the breeze up,
Knees up Mother Brown.

WHERE DID YOU GET THAT HAT?

Where did you get that hat?
Where did you get that tile?
Isn’t it a nobby one,
And just the proper style?
I should like to have one
Etc., etc.

CUCUMBER SONG

I like pickled onions, I like piccalilli.
Pickled cabbage is alright
With a bit of cold meat on Sunday night.
I can go termatoes, but what I do prefer,
Is a little bit of cucum – I-cum-u-cum
Little bit of cucumber.

I’M FOLLOWING FATHER’S FOOTSTEPS

I’m following in father’s footsteps;
I’m following the dear old dad.
He’s just in front with a fine big gal,
So I thought I’d have one as well.
I don’t know where he’s going,
But when he gets there I’ll be glad.
I’m following in father’s footsteps,
Yes I’m following the dear old dad.

A WEE DEOCH-AN-DORIS

Just a wee deoch-an-doris,
Just a wee drap, that’s a?
Just a wee deoch-an-doris,
Before we gang awa?
There’s a wee wifie waitin,
In a wee but-an-ben;
If you can say, “It’s a braw bricht moonlit nicht,”
Ye’re a’ right, ye ken.

THE BARROW BOY SONG

All my life I’ve wanted to be a barrow boy
A barrow boy is all I’ve wanted to be
I push my barrow – I handle it with pride –
I’m a coster – a coster from over the Lambeth side
I turn me back upon the high society
Take me where the ripe bananas grow,
They’re only a dozen a shilling,
That’s how I earns me living –
I ought to have been a barrow boy years ago.

FALL IN AND FOLLOW ME

Fall in and follow me!
Fall in and follow me!
Come along and never mind the weather
Altogether, stand by me, boys;
I know the way to go,
I’ll take you for a spree,
You do as I do, and you’ll be right,
Fall in and follow me.

DON’T DILLY DALLY ON THE WAY

My old man said, “Follow the van,
Don’t dilly-dally on the way!” –
Off went the van with the home packed in it,
I walked behind with my old cock linnet,
But I dillied and dallied, dallied and dillied
Lost my way and don’t know where to roam.
I stopped on the way to have the old half quartern,
And I can’t find my way home.

ANY OLD IRON

Any old iron, any old iron,
Any, any, any old iron
You look neat, talk about a treat
You look dapper from your napper to your feet
Dress’d in style, brand new tile,
And your father’s old green tie on;
But I wouldn’t give you tuppence
For your old watch chain,
Old iron, old iron.

WHAT A MOUTH

What a mouth! What a mouth
What a north and south!
Blimey what a mouth he’s got!
When he was a youngster, O! Lord Lovell,
Why his poor old mother
Used to feed him with a shovel.
What a gap! Poor chap!
He’s never been known to laugh,
For if he did – it’s a penny to a quid
That his face’d fall in half!

I’M HENERY THE EIGHTH I AM

I’m Henery the Eighth I am
Henery the Eighth, I am! I am!
I got married to the widow next door,
She’s been married seven times before.
Every one was a Henery
She wouldn’t have a Willie or a Sam
I’m her eighth old man named Henery
Henery the Eighth I am!

WORK SONG

On Monday I never go to work
On Tuesday I stay at home,
On Wednesday I don’t feel inclined,
Work’s the last thing on my mind
Thursday’s half holiday
And Friday I detest;
Too late to make a start on Saturday
And Sunday’s my day of rest.

WOT CHER!

Wot cher all the neighbours cried
Who’re yer goin’ to meet Bill?
Have yer bought the street, Bill?
Laugh, I thought I should ‘ave died
Knocked ‘em in the Old Kent Road.

KNEES UP MOTHER BROWN (Repeat of Chorus)

LADIES OF THE CHORUS & TERPSICHORIANS

MISS ISOBEL BELL
MISS JUDITH BUTTERY
MISS DIANE DOOLEY
MISS JENNY HOGG
MISS SUE LONDON
MISS SHERRY OLDHAM
MISS ELLY-ANN PRITCHARD
MISS BERYL RITCHIE

GENTLEMEN OF THE CHORUS

MR GEORGE FRENCH
MR STUART McKEE
MR WARREN MALCOLM
MR PETER PANGARI
MR WILLIAM PERRY

Artistic Designer and Gaslight Expert –
GWYN ACE, Esq.

THE CANTERBURY ARMS WAITRESSES:
Miss Moira Bewley   Miss Sonia Hyde
Miss Marie Cameron   Miss Alison Scott
Miss Pauline Davidson   Miss Julie Williams
Miss Diane Duff   Miss Susan Unsworth

Stage Manager Supreme – Mr DONALD HURLEY

Décor & Stage Creations – Mr BRENT REDDING
ably assisted by Miss PAULA JEPSON & Miss DOREEN HAWKESWOOD

Ladies & Gents Modish Fashions – Miss EVELYN WEBB-PULLMAN, Miss SYBIL REAY and FRANCES STEPHENS

Gaslight Attendant – Mr ROBERT LOCKYER

Master Printer of Posters – Mr Trevor RUFFELL

Napier Operatic Society’s Esteemed and Venerable Committee –

Patron: Edward Collier
William Beckett, Pres.   Lyndsay Brown
Frederick Twyford, Sec.   Alan Jones
Bunny Unsworth   Tessa Brown
Audrey London   Digby Edgecombe
Peter Dixon   Robin Johnson
Michael Hyde   William Perry
Malcolm Kenah   Les Deere
Donald Hurley, Chair.

Creative talents of willing friends have added to your comfort and enjoyment.

WILLIAM BECKETT
– Proprietor & Manager

AUDREY LONDON
– Hostess

RETURN WITH YOUR FRIENDS
TO THE TABARD THEATRE

McMillin Craig Limited, Napier